I must either be completely out of my mind or be extremely filled with wisdom. I'm away from society atleast physically and I'm trying to do it electronically and socially. I live in a farm now, atleast for week I've been here and I willl be here till college reopens. Maybe after reading Walden, I got this idea. Okay back to upstream color again. I owe you so much da Shane carruth.
Here, life is very minimal. Very quiet. I think I really enjoy it. But I also fucking hate how there is no noise to distract me from thinking. Here me and me have no barriers at all in between. This means I can end up doing something really spontaneous similar to a drunk dial. I won't let that happen.
Me and my uncle, we set up solar panels for this little shed we reside in. It's a simple place, like a studio with a kitchen and a bathroom. I assume my friends would look at this place and run a hundred miles away. But as ever, I'm resilient. There is no water in the taps. They have to be taken from the drums. There is nobody but my family in a radius of 5 miles. It feels like I live in a forest. I work on the soil before my classes begin in the morning. I'm just learning how to, from my uncle. Now, I think after one week I'm fairy good at handling a sickle and a plough. Aruvaal they call it. When you grip it hard and strike, skin from your palm tears. Exactly what happened. My palm is full of blisters and removed skin. My forearm has a lot of scratched and seeping blood from those 25 kg blocks I moved today. I have always hated pain, and now I don't know if it is good for me. It's a distraction. My body aches as I wake up in the morning, every bone, every muscle. Attending classes is a struggle.
It has been raining all day for a few days and the soil is sticky. The thagaram sheet above rattles and the sound of rain thunders down. At times, it's too messy. But, after a long time, things are pure and simple. And different. Even if uncomfortable.
Attending classes by the swing in the midst of trees is a blessing. I can sleep better that way. But it is night by 7. The sky would be dark and I get drowsy.
I stay away, as best I can from the world and slowly grow closer to myself. I walk around the forest, phone in the pocket and music in my ears. And I walk around for hours, talking to friends who call. Yes, I talk better nowadays.
It has been fucking glorious. And fucking messy. And I think I'll choose this over anything else if only I have my own space. I think I'll move away from this little cottage shed and set up my tent a few metres away.
We have just planted onions and garlic. Not too much, just enough for the family. My grandma has started with tomato and brinjal. She has also scattered spinach around.
I love it but I can't wait for the day I'll go back to Chennai.
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